dearest little d.

It has been 2 days past your due date. I'm not even sure if 2 days ago was your "due date". From the start, I believe you were conceived a little later than the doctor believed. I've always felt that your due date should've been later.

Honestly, no matter how hard pregnancy is for me, I would do it however long you want me to. You are such a joy inside me and although I want to hold you in my arms soon, I want you to take all the time you need. The last thing I want to do is to rush you out when you are not ready.

On the other hand, I am sad that other people and the circumstances can't be as patient as I am. I am sad that there is such a system in the medical world to induce people and intervene in the most natural process that God has created. Some cases could be different, but I strongly, strongly feel that you are perfectly healthy and normal. You're just taking a little longer compare to other babies, but you're normal. It doesn't have to be solved with something like induction.

So... that word came up on the 40 weeks Dr appointment today. I kind of knew it was coming, but it startled and saddened me anyway when the Dr really spoke it out loud. I know induction doesn't mean ultimate C-section (that I truly dread the most), but it is still a medical intervention that I want to avoid because it increases the chance of CS.

I've been doing a lot of "what-ifs" today and face my fear. And you know what? It's hard to know what to believe now, but there is one thing I believe without any doubt... God is still good. No matter what happen, no matter when or how you will come out, God is still good. He will never leave or forsake us.

And I hope you decide to come out soon :)

Kisses & hugs,

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